Q: Does anyone care for 2 hours and 45 minutes of pure, ungrated cheese?
A: Why not? After all, I liked “Braveheart.”
Okay, I’m being a little light on this one.
Okay, really light. But I have seen a bunch of crap lately. “The Patriot” is not as good as “Braveheart,” but it is almost as long. And it feels longer. Yes, it is a stinky pile of cheese with cliched characters and familiar situations. But, there are enough scenes (especially early on in the film) with great action sequences, and Mel Gibson is a pretty good leading man (for an Australian). Cut out an hour- the right one- and it’s all good. This film comes from Roland Emmerich, the director of such vile, time-eating shit-fests as “Independence Day” and “Godzilla.” And, believe me, compared to them, “The Patriot” is fucking “Gone With the Wind.”
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Eric is the Editor-in-Chief of Scene-Stealers.com, a Rotten Tomatoes-approved critic, and contributor for The Pitch. He’s former President of the KCFCC, and drummer for The Dead Girls, Ultimate Fakebook, and Truck Stop Love . He is also the 2013 Air Guitar World Champion Mean Melin, ranked 4th best of all-time. Eric goes to 11. Follow him at:
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