[Rating: Solid Rock Fist Up]
In 1987, the icon Cher taught us—like Dean Martin before her—that when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, “that’s amore!” In 2022, Halle Berry tells us that the moon will hit more than your eye!
It’s what 2022 is shaping up to be.
In the latest disaster flick, Moonfall, our moon is tracking off course. Is it a scientific reason, a mass conspiracy, or something far more sinister than you could ever imagine? Director Roland Emmerich, a purveyor of disaster flicks is back and more outrageous than ever. This film is illogical, a mess in editing and screenplay, and goofy in all acting regards.
And yet, I think I loved it?
In 2011, astronaut Brian Harper (Patrick Wilson) works on repairing a satellite in space when something mysterious strikes his ship. This black mass of seemingly alien technology in space is only seen by him, as his counterpart Jocinda Fowler (Berry) is knocked out. After claiming what he saw was not a hoax, Harper is fired from NASA and leads his life as a washed-up former astronaut while Fowler rises in the ranks at NASA. Flash forward a decade later when conspiracy theorist K.C. Houseman (John Bradley) notices that the moon’s orbit and location from earth is changing, something that should not happen for millions of years. He seeks out Harper to make contact with NASA and the world to dispel this conspiracy because something catastrophic could happen.
In all government glory, NASA knows something is up and rehires Harper to lead a team alongside Fowler and Houseman to investigate the surface of the moon to stop what is now being seen as an extra-terrestrial entity. Will they stop whatever is happening on the moon before impact on our planet, or will our fate be doomed?
A movie like this should not work. I am positive there’s no scientific reason behind half of the stuff in this film. Think of it as one big conspiracy melted into a two-plus hour film. And yet, through all the “the moon is hollow,” “we already had a rocket ready to go,” and jumps in time that are never fully explained, Moonfall is just plain fun.
Most of the time I was asking myself what Neil deGrasse Tyson might say about this. He’d probably hate it, but with the amount of good action and good special effects depicting what happens when the moon gets a little too close to earth and causes huge ass waves, I’m all for that shit. This is, dare I say, some of Halle Berry’s best work in YEARS.
Overall, I think people will have fun with Moonfall. In the cold winter months when movies in theaters aren’t that great for the pickin’, this will at least keep you on the edge of your seats into one of the most batshit craziest rides through the galaxy.
Christian Ramos is a classic film fan, having had the dream to host Turner Classic Movies for years now. He also has a large amount of Oscar trivia in his head, remembers dressing as Groucho Marx one Halloween, and cherishes the moment Julianne Moore liked his tweet.
Comments on this entry are closed.